Annual relationship audit worksheet

Once a year, usually late December or early January, sweep your network. The exercise takes 90 minutes and produces a Q1 outreach plan that's worth more than 10x the time.

List the 50 people who most influenced your year
Don't overthink it: your inbox and calendar will tell you. Investors, customers, advisors, mentors, friends who shipped something with you.
Mark each on a 1-5 closeness scale
1 = haven't spoken since the last time you put them on a list like this. 5 = you'd answer their late-night call without checking the time.
Mark each on a 'momentum' scale: up, flat, down
Up = the relationship is closer than it was last year. Flat = same as last year. Down = drifting. Be honest.
Count asks given vs received in the last 12 months
How many times did you ask them for something (intro, advice, favor)? How many times did they ask you? The ratio matters more than the count.
Pick the top 5 'down' relationships you want to rescue
These are your Q1 outreach list. Schedule one specific touch with each in the first 6 weeks of the year.
Identify everyone you've taken from without repaying
Ratio worse than 1:1 in your favor? Plan a give for them before the end of Q1. Even a small one. Especially a small one.
Mark 5 relationships you're consciously letting fade
Not everyone needs to be a 5. Some relationships served their season. Acknowledging this is healthier than guilt-maintaining them.
Send a year-end thank-you to your top 10
Specific. No mass email. One paragraph each is enough. Reference an actual moment.

Why the ratio matters more than the count

The temptation in any network exercise is to count how much you reached out. The thing that actually predicts relationship durability is the ratioof giving to taking. People will tolerate irregular contact. They will not tolerate a perceived imbalance, especially when they think you’ve forgotten that the imbalance exists.

The audit is mostly about catching imbalances early enough to repay them. Once a year is the minimum frequency. More often is better, which is the entire point of Wend.

Annual relationship audit worksheet

Once a year, usually late December or early January, sweep your network. The exercise takes 90 minutes and produces a Q1 outreach plan that's worth more than 10x the time.

List the 50 people who most influenced your year
Don't overthink it: your inbox and calendar will tell you. Investors, customers, advisors, mentors, friends who shipped something with you.
Mark each on a 1-5 closeness scale
1 = haven't spoken since the last time you put them on a list like this. 5 = you'd answer their late-night call without checking the time.
Mark each on a 'momentum' scale: up, flat, down
Up = the relationship is closer than it was last year. Flat = same as last year. Down = drifting. Be honest.
Count asks given vs received in the last 12 months
How many times did you ask them for something (intro, advice, favor)? How many times did they ask you? The ratio matters more than the count.
Pick the top 5 'down' relationships you want to rescue
These are your Q1 outreach list. Schedule one specific touch with each in the first 6 weeks of the year.
Identify everyone you've taken from without repaying
Ratio worse than 1:1 in your favor? Plan a give for them before the end of Q1. Even a small one. Especially a small one.
Mark 5 relationships you're consciously letting fade
Not everyone needs to be a 5. Some relationships served their season. Acknowledging this is healthier than guilt-maintaining them.
Send a year-end thank-you to your top 10
Specific. No mass email. One paragraph each is enough. Reference an actual moment.

Why the ratio matters more than the count

The audit is mostly about catching imbalances early enough to repay them. Once a year is the minimum frequency. More often is better, which is the entire point of Wend.